We have a “happiness” addiction in America! We live as if happiness is the only thing that matters. What does someone say when a person gets married, or graduates? “I just want them to be ________? (happy!). Well, when did happiness become our god? The late Russian dissident Alexander Solzhenitsyn once said, “One should never direct people towards happiness, because happiness too is an idol of the market place.” He went on to say one should direct people to love. To paraphrase his point, a dog gnawing on a bone can be “happy”, but only human beings can feel affection for each other.

 

JOHN MAKES THE POINT THAT LOVE IS NOT A SENTIMENT, BUT RATHER ACTION THAT GROWS OUT OF THE VERY NATURE OF GOD. Do you see it in vv. 8 and 16? “God is love.” Not that God teaches love, or points the way to love, or can help us love. God IS love. And when we love out of God’s resources, rather than love based on the way we are treated, or how we “feel”, we cease loving based on our emotions and we cease loving based on who is lovable and who deserves it.

 

Here’s how most of us do relationships: “God, I’ll change him; you love him.” God says, “No. Reverse that.” Learn to pray and live, “God, I’ll love him; YOU change him!” We are not God. We have no right to try to change anyone. God does that! In all our relationships, we learn to love out of God’s resources, not our own.

 

I like the story of the Sunday School teacher who told a little boy, “Now, we’ve learned one of the Ten Commandments, ‘Honor your father and mother…’ Is there a commandment that relates to your sister?” “Yes,” replied the boy, “thou shall not kill.” I would call your attention to v. 21. Loving others in not optional if you are a believer. “…those who love God MUST love others…” Must? As in “must” pay your taxes, be in by midnight, take your medicine, take a bath, brush your teethe. Are any of these options?

 

JOHN FURTHER MAKES THE POINT THAT GOD’S LOVE IS MADE COMPLETE IN US—v. 12. Does your Bible say “perfected”? It means matured, completed, rounded out, fully developed. Now let me state the obvious: God’s love is not made full, mature, complete in doorknobs, or billy goats, or beautiful sunsets. “God lives IN US, AND HIS LOVE IS PERFECTED IN US.” Let’s try an analogy. Let’s say that here is a song. The choir sang it last week. It’s beautiful. But if it’s not sung, it’s just ink blots and lines on a page. It’s not music until it’s sung. How are people going to see Christ? How will people learn about God and His love? Do we just say, “Here’s a Bible”? Do we use a bunch of church words? Or point them to a building? No. We live it. We sing it with our behavior and lifestyles.

 

G. Campbell Morgan, a great British preacher of another day, had five sons, all of whom became preachers. A visitor in the home once asked, “Who’s the best preacher in your family?” Their answer was quick and unanimous: “Mother!” She didn’t stand behind a pulpit, but her life was love and people saw it. You see, people can’t see God, but they can see our lives. 

 

JOHN FINALLY MAKES THE POINT THAT WHEN THIS LOVE IS MATURED IN US, IT CASTS OUT FEAR—vv. 17-18. Now, I don’t know about you. But I don’t make good decisions when I am afraid. When I am operating out of fear, I get angry, or controlling, or selfish, or ashamed. Fear! Edward McDowell has pointed out that fear paralyzes and inhibits our efforts, it separates us from each other and creates suspicion. It breeds violence. And I would add, it distracts us and causes us to lose our focus and interrupts spiritual and emotional growth.

 

The Amplified Bible phrases it this way: “There is no fear in love—dread does not exist; but full-grown love turns fear out of doors and expels every trace of terror! For…he who is afraid has not reached the full maturity of love—has not yet grown into love’s complete perfection.”

 

Jeanie McGowan, one of our associate pastors, told me this week about a book entitled Healing Your Image of God. Some of us are afraid because of our image of God. But look at v. 10. Note the direction of the loving, from God to us. God made the first move: v. 10. The word used for “atoning sacrifice” DOES NOT mean that God was angry and had to be appeased. God doesn’t work that way. It’s not our works that save us. And the cross does not just cover over our sins. Rather, God in Christ removed the source of our broken relationship with Him, along with the guilt, shame and fear.

 

When you realize deep, deep in the core of your being, that you are loved by God, it changes everything! When the deepest needs of your life are met by Jesus, you can risk loving others. You can forgive. You aren’t afraid of God anymore. Nor are you afraid of others, or of the pain of relationships. Hey, I know enough Star Trek mythology to remember that whenever the Starship Enterprise was in trouble, she would put up her deflector shields. But when she did that, there wasn’t enough energy available to do the positive things she needed to do. Think how much energy is sapped by our fear! Think what it would be like to live in God’s love, and all that energy would be freed up to love, reach out, forgive, heal, help and serve.

 

Charles and Martha Shedd used to write a lot of books about marriage, love and relationships. They shared that when they first married, they made a pledge to each other: “There is nothing you can do to make me stop loving you. I’m committed to you. You don’t have to be afraid!” And you don’t either! Perfect love casts out fear!